Kyle from SMPR – First Day of Class

I didn’t choose the box life. The box life chose me. I mean, yeah of course I have a tragic backstory to explain why I live in a box. A story so sad it’d make anyone’s box swell up with tears and fall apart. But this isn’t the time to focus on that. It’s time to focus on the first day of class! Through my hard work and ambitions today I take my gigantic first step toward a career. And that career is…!

Shoot, what am I going to school for? I can’t believe I forgot! I know I relocated my box to MMUCMS, which stands for…!

UHG, I can’t remember that either! Think, Kyle, think! MMUCMS…Something something University of Comedic Medical Studies! A ha! That’s right, I wanna be a comedy doctor! It’s my lifelong dream!… Other than being a famous rockstar, actor, philanthropist, and co-owner of a restaurant that serves breakfast all day. This is definitely my calling in life. I can feel it in my bones, which I look forward to learning the names of.

It’s a long, long road ahead but I’m sure this is the career goal that will make everything turn around for me. Maybe I can finally stop living in a box outdoors, and buy a nice house in the suburbs where my box and I can live together in peace, harmony, and centralized air conditioning. That’d be so sweet.

Oh, I think I hear people walking over. I guess that’s my cue. Time for class!